Tuesday, June 28, 2016

The Present

"Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. 
That's why it's called the present." 

What if where I am is exactly where I am supposed to be? Seems easy until you think about it. Is all this suffering and anguish for nothing?

I am just a cog in the wheel of a much larger picture. A vital cog, but a cog nonetheless.

I had the privilege of watching my second cousin get married this past weekend. I got to spend some time with many family members that I do not interact with regularly. It was so amazing. The bride was breathtaking and I was so happy for her that my heart felt like it was going to burst. I could not stop smiling and clapping.

There were stories and laughter and joking and I was a part of it all just by being me. I am a piece of that puzzle whether I was aware of it or not. If you look at our extended family tree, there will always be a place for me. And a place for the family that I have created, too.

Being a part of something so big and so much outside of the realm of what I am used to was really good for me. It got me outside of my head and into the moment. I was able to enjoy the event and the family and not get hung up on the day to day things that tend to weigh me down. 

I want to start practicing mindfulness. I want to learn how to dismiss the negative thoughts as they enter and to stop judging myself. The harder I am on myself, the harder I expect others to be and it's a vicious cycle. I am also subconsciously teaching my daughter that this type of behavior is ok and it is not.

How many of us live like today is a gift? Like today is a present that should be appreciated and cherished? Too often we are looking at the last thing or the next thing and do not value the now. I am very guilty of looking forward and back and not at what is in front of me.

I learned that one of my extended family members left Poland via Kindertransport in May of 1939. Kindertransport was the informal name of a series of rescue efforts which brought thousands of refugee Jewish children to Great Britain from Nazi Germany between 1938 and 1940. I had no idea. My mom knew. That generation all knew, of course. The stories had not all made it down to me and I could not get enough. There are people that have known me my whole life who have these amazing narratives to tell. If you asked this particular cousin if he lived in the past or the present or the future, I am willing to bet that he lives in the now. He has to see that today is indeed a present. A gift. I could be wrong and it's not fair of me to speak for him, but through my eyes, this is what I see.

What if where I am is exactly where I am supposed to be after all?

ay's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html
Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html
Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present. Bil Keane
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html
Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present. Bil Keane
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html
Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html
Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/bilkeane121860.html

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