Thursday, April 3, 2014

You take the good, you take the bad...

You take the good, you take the bad,
You take them both and there you have
The facts of life, the facts of life.

You can't read those words and not sing them.  At least not if you are in my general age.  I grew up watching "The Facts of Life" and still know the theme song by heart.

This post is not about great 80's sitcoms, though.  It's about taking the "good" and the "bad".

Saturday is Miranda's 1st birthday party.  We are keeping it pretty small because our house literally cannot hold all the love we have to fill it with!  There will be a rainbow cake and rainbow decorations and little rainbow souvenirs for her cousins and friends to take home.  There will be lots of food and plenty of sounds of kids running around, shrieking about and having a great time.

Sunday is my father's funeral.  It's traditional in Judaism to bury the dead within 48 hours, but my dad was anything but typical.  He did not want a traditional funeral.  He wanted a graveside ceremony and then a big ol' party afterwards.  Attendance is so high now that we are making sure there is a microphone at the restaurant so anyone that wants to speak can be heard.  A microphone.  

And so I am faced with 2 big events in the course of 2 days.  One happy.  One sad.

I remember planning Allie's 1st birthday party.  I was happy to have so much support but sad that she was not here to enjoy it.  I planned food for grown ups and ordered balloons for us to release and it was lovely.  But it was not a child's birthday party.

Miranda's 1st birthday party is totally a child's birthday party. I have spent much of the week trying to get the house ready and that includes trying to find a place for her toys and trying to figure out if we should leave the pack & play up in case a baby needs it (probably) and if I should put the cases of diapers and wipes in the basement so they are not in the way (probably).  I want to make sure there are kid friendly snacks and that there are enough rainbows in this house that the kids think they are in Oz.  Or a place where there are lots of rainbows anyway.

In between all that planning is making sure I have a suit for Sunday.  Making sure I have pantyhose to wear.  Aside from job interviews, funerals are the only time I wear those god-awful things.   I want to write down some notes in case I choose to speak.  I want to make sure to leave enough time to get to the cemetery early to greet people.  I want to make sure to thank my brother-in-law 1,000 times over for watching Miranda so that her day will not be disrupted.  I want to make sure to not be too sad as that is not what my dad would have wanted.

It's enough to make my head spin!  Celebrating the biggest joy while mourning one of the biggest losses.  In a way, I grieved my dad a long time ago.  And heaven knows we have been celebrating Miranda since March 13th of LAST year when we got the call that we were going to be her parents.  But still.  The good and the bad...and taking them all.  It's a lot.  It's life.  It's the facts of my life, anyway!

Officially 1 years old!


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