livelovelaugh: Friendship is...

When Gary and I were first dating, I asked him to do something for me. I can't remember what it was but I remember saying, "Be your best friend" and laughing. He looked at me with a very serious face and said, "you already are my best friend." I realized that he was right. We were (and are) each others best friends.

I am lucky enough to have other best friends in my life. Friendships that I have cultivated and nurtured and treated with care to make sure they would always be there. I have mentioned many of these friends in my blog - the ones from my childhood that knew me with braces and bad hair cuts and love me in spite of it all. Friends from high school that were there for first crushes and proms and drama productions. Friends from college that were there for all the growing pains and more bad hair cuts and probably some heart break. Friends from different jobs. Friends from friends. Family that became friends.

This past weekend, I went to the beach. That's right. I went away. Overnight. Without Miranda. I was not sure I could do it. I was not sure I wanted to do it. I knew I needed a little time to myself and that I could benefit from a day or two to recharge and to refresh. Gary said he was looking forward to daddy/daughter time. He took all my fears and made me confront them and in the end, I hit the open road late Friday night.

Leaving was much harder than I thought. I was crying to hard that I could not see straight. Gary hates when I cry as it makes him cry so there we were, both crying, while Miranda was giggling her head off. (She thinks it is a riot when I cry and has laughed more than once at me this week as she has started teething and this may have caused a few tears on my end as I am SO VERY TIRED). Anyway...there we were, crying and laughing and I am sure if I had been able to take a step back, I would have cracked up! In the moment, however, I was so afraid to leave them both.

A half hour after I planned to leave, I finally left. Gary and Miranda waved to me as I pulled out of the driveway and off I went. I was a mess for the first 30 minutes or so and then I felt the stress start to lift. I turned the radio up and tried to enjoy the solitude and the night sky and the anticipation of the days ahead.

Slowly I started to relax. I inhaled. I exhaled. I enjoyed the peace. I enjoyed the quiet. Before I knew it, I had arrived.

The weekend was wonderful. We laughed so hard that we had trouble breathing. We shared stories and hopes and fears. We talked about our kids and we talked about our other relationships. We swam in the ocean. We wiggled our toes in the sand. We took a dip in the pool. We went out for a fresh seafood dinner. We shopped in the little boutique shops. We missed our friends who were unable to make it this year but shared stories about them that made us laugh at the memories.

Through it all, Gary sent me pictures and updates. I missed them and I was worried that I was not here to help with feedings and diaper changes and play time and nap time. We did a video chat and I could see how happy they both were. They went on walks. They went to the mall. They chilled out and napped.

I am so glad I went. I think it's great for Miranda to see the network of friends that I have built. I think it's great for her to get that special one-on-one time with her daddy. I think it's great for me to be surrounded by love and laughter and compassion that only true friends can provide. I think it's great that my husband is my best friend and encouraged me to go.

Friendship is the most wonderful gift. I can't wait to pass that knowledge down to my daughter. I can't wait to see who she chooses to be by her side. In grade school. In Hebrew school. In high school. In college. In her career. In her life.

Friendship is...whatever you allow it to be. Driving hours and hours to spend just a few together. Sacrificing yourself for the needs of another. Dropping everything to be by their side. Encouraging. Supporting. Loving. Sharing secrets. Sharing memories. Sharing your life experiences. Friendship is....well, everything.