There is a code that applies to all people with the name mom. Young, old, natural, adopted, step, foster...it doesn't matter. If you have ever been called mom, you know the code.
When you see another mom struggling in the parking lot, trying to unfold her bulky stroller while a baby wails in her arms, you go over to help. When you see a mom trying to walk her tray of Chick-Fil-A nuggets over to her table with a toddler in tow, you go over and offer assistance. When you hear a baby screaming in a store and see the mom look flustered and maybe even embarrassed, you look at her with compassion and not frustration.
When Miranda was teeny tiny, I remember taking her to meet Gary for lunch. It was pouring and I was soaked, trying to block the water from our infant. A mom walked by and said to me, "I remember those days all too well!" and kept walking.
I do not know what I expected her to do, but that was not it. Sleep deprived, cold and now drenched, all I wanted to do was burst into tears. That was maybe the day I learned the code.
I would NOT be that woman. I would not let any other mom every feel that way if I could help it.
Now that my child is not longer an infant, I have less control over her when we are out. She is often testing the limits and running away or trying to jump in place or generally just being silly. It's not as easy to walk over to another mom and obey the code when my kid is already half way down the escalator and may or may not be holding on tight. But I vow that when I can, if I can, I will be the compassionate mom and not the one too busy to help other moms.
We have to stick together. For the sake of our kids and ourselves, we must!
I rely on these same moms to help me when I am struggling. Often I turn to friends or family, but sometimes I find myself talking to a complete stranger because she is there, I am there, and our kids are in the same vicinity. There is a bond in our code and I love it.
I hope that I am not the only one that has experienced the mom code. I also hope more and more moms learn to honor and follow it! That's the beauty of the unspoken code - you can join or adhere to the code at any time and any place. #time2momup